In the past month, I have had three guy friends tell me something quite interesting, almost jaw-dropping. It’s something I never thought I’d hear from three masculine, scruffy-type, sports nuts.
Each guy has recently been plagued by the thought of "the one who got away.”
Three males – the gender that farts at will and would rather watch re-runs of the 1998 Utah-Chicago NBA Finals than enjoy a candle-lit evening for two – were reminiscing and longing for women who were no longer a part of their lives. Who would have thought?
I always figured it was us gals who got all sappy about that hunk that swept us off of our feet, then had to move 2,000 miles across country and was never seen or heard from again, or the serious boyfriend who wanted to settle down and start a family while you wanted to experiment and enjoy the other fish in the big sea of men. Our culture has conditioned us to feel like most men aren’t the lovey-dovey, nurturing, crazy-in-love romantic types. And longing for that partner – the one who got away – certainly lends itself to the destruction of that stereotype.
For that matter, how does one know that they've missed out? Is it that instinct – the stomach-churning feeling you get when you see the movie that you first saw together? Is it a matter of simple deduction based on number of girlfriends (zero) since the spectacular relationship? Is it the fact that all you can think about is her – her scent, her laugh and her touch?
I feel as though the one who got away will always be just that – away. If things were meant to be, then, she wouldn’t have gotten away in the first place. You would be dating or married or would have given the relationship a shot, decided it wasn’t going to work and then, well, at least you wouldn’t be longing for her as the one that slipped through your fingers.
It’s romantic of us – even the male gender – to dream about that idealistic perfect partner. There’s nothing wrong with dreaming about her scent, her touch. But, sooner or later, we all have to get our heads out of the clouds.
Friday, January 12, 2007
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2 comments:
Yeah, I totally understand the concept...I would find myself wanting my ex back whenever I went on a bad date with another guy...I'd say to myself, this wouldn't be happening to me if I had stayed with (insert name). And there are times when I wonder if some of my exes consider me the "one who got away." But ultimately, things happen for a reason, and if you're meant to be together again, you will be. Until then, that person is in the past and you need to smile at the memories and move forward.
My ACC nemesis said...
"I feel as though the one who got away will always be just that – away. If things were meant to be, then, she wouldn’t have gotten away in the first place. You would be dating or married or would have given the relationship a shot, decided it wasn’t going to work and then, well, at least you wouldn’t be longing for her as the one that slipped through your fingers."
....And as one of those three aforementioned sports watching, at will farters that gets more sentimentality out of watching classic ball games than much of anything else, I found out you're right. Oh well. Funny how people grow and times change and on and on.
Selective memories make us always remember the good stuff. It's easier that way I guess. Ha, though with friends like us, at least this blog will always have new material! I'm off to go play some Madden now.
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