Monday, December 03, 2007

My stripper stash

I was in "purge" mode this weekend, going through a box of papers and old notebooks, when I stumbled across a pile of stripper photos. I wasn't kidding before when I said my friend Trouble and I were male stripper connoisseurs. There were photos of men in G-strings dancing, autographed posed shots, photos of dudes surrounded by dollar-waving, liquored-up women that made you wonder if the guys made it out alive.

I actually blushed as I flipped through them. I flashed back to the time my mom found a Polaroid of me at one of the shows -- I was sitting in a chair surrounded by men in tiny denim shorts, with a blond hunk on my lap. My smile in the shot is nothing short of beatific. "Were you drunk?" my mom exclaimed, offering me an excuse. "Nope," I admitted. It was the truth. I was totally at home with a pack of near-nekkid, sweet-smelling, tousled-haired men pressed against me.

Hmm. I hope I still have that Polaroid somewhere.

The photos remind me I'm not the girl I was 15 years ago: hard-drinkin', barely-sleepin', spending my money on strippers and club outfits while the credit card bills went unpaid. Now I'm nearing 40, a homeowner who drives an SUV and has a retirement plan.

And yet ...

The remnants of that girl live inside me. I came of age with raves and rap, so I have to go out dancing periodically to stay sane. (If I get too old for the clubs, I guess I'll start having house parties. Rob Bass and Lords of Acid will not be denied.) I still like alcohol, but I've stopped going for the drinks designed to get you the drunkest, fastest. The girl has matured into a woman who likes to have a good time, but knows there's more to life than the next good time.

However ... I do have a framed, autographed picture of a porn actor smiling at me here in my home office. He goes in a drawer when mom comes to visit.

Some habits are hard to break.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

When are you gonna stop talkin bout yourself and talk about relationships?

Anonymous said...

Seriously? This is what you think belongx on charlotte.com?

Anonymous said...

I thought it was cute.

Anonymous said...

Well, let's just see these pics and decide for ourselves just how drunk you were! Come on, don't tease!

The question is, did ya ever do "the enjoyable" with one of these cats?

Anonymous said...

Thanks Tonya!

Anonymous said...

Deirdre will start talking about relationships once she gets into one! In the meantime, she's talking about the single life of a woman who is a free agent and isn't with a man just so she can say she has one. Some of us singles have standards!

ThatsJustSad said...

She is talking about her relationship...with herself...sitting alone at home...looking at porn....