Monday, January 28, 2008

To wear or not to wear a wedding band

There’s the tall, dark and handsome man sitting at the bar, and you carefully watch as he picks up his glass of Merlot with his left hand. Nope. No wedding band. You’re good.

Then, there’s the attractive brunette in the crowded business meeting who has a smile that makes you feel fuzzy inside. You watch as she passes the meeting notes. Score! No big diamond.

Before you get your hopes up. Guess what? Those potential dates you're gawking at -- they're both married.

The wedding band is a ubiquitous symbol of attachment and a lifelong commitment to your partner, but who’s to say if someone isn’t wearing his or her ring then that means they’re unfaithful or disrespecting their spouse?

Some women stop wearing their rings because they gained weight and it no longer fits. A few men don't wear their bands because it's considered a job hazard. Most couples know they made a commitment to each other -- not to the ring. Other couples would face nasty repercussions if they were caught without the left-handed jewelry.

Every couple has his or her own reasons, and I respect that.

Miss Manners, in an online article, sums up my thoughts exactly: “A wedding ring is a symbol, not an announcement to prospective consumers of what to expect. You must have noticed that rings are easily removable, so they do not offer much protection against unscrupulous advances.”

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

The two reasons you have listed are exactly the reasons my husband and I don't wear our bands. I've gained weight and can't wear mine (I can't afford to have it sized right now) and my husband can't wear his for work. It doesn't matter to us, we know we're married. Besides if anyone of the opposite sex were to approach us, we'd be honest and let them know we're spoken for. We don't need a ring to symbolize that.

Anonymous said...

I lost mine (took it off to play basketball) years ago and never replaced it. Seemed to be a waste of money as I'd probably lose it again. Since then I've wondered if women I interact with draw conclusions about my lack of a ring -- like maybe I'm divorced -- but it really does not matter to me one way or another.

Anonymous said...

I'm preggo now and am too swollen to wear my ring. But even when I did, that didn't stop guys from hitting on me. I just tell them I'm spoken for, and they move on. I guess anyone that breathes is a potential target, married or not.

Anonymous said...

What a stupid article. Snore

Anonymous said...

I haven't worn mine since I lost weight and lost my engagement ring at a swimming pool (the wedding band stayed on). Luckily it was found and returned, but I've been nervous to wear both rings ever since.

I did get a ring guard but it only lasted a few weeks and then fell off. My husband isn't bothered by it even though he is still wearing his ring. We are both more worried about losing them than having the rings on my finger.

I'm pregnant now, so maybe towards the end of my pregnancy my rings will be snug enough to wear again. Not worried about getting hit on much, since I have a big belly and 3 kids in tow. :)

Anonymous said...

My hubby doesn't wear his ring because of work either. He had it on years ago and was electrocuted badly and had to have the melted ring cut from his hand. Besides I know he is coming home to me every night and I don't need to see a ring to know that.

Anonymous said...

Been married for 26 years - neither of us wear our rings. I will wear my diamond if we are going out in the evening - but that is it. We both work on the computer all day, work in the yard, house, etc - just gets in the way and I don't want to loose it.

Anonymous said...

do you two really get paid to write these articles? I need to quit my job. I can write about crap no one cares about too.

Anonymous said...

So what's your point? Is there some conclusion readers are supposed to reach, or some opinion readers should form by reading this useless Internet blog you've created here?

Does the newspaper really pay you two to come up with this stuff? Who's your editor? Does he or she really know how mundane/inane the content of your "writing" is?

Yawn...z-z-z-z-z.

Anonymous said...

When my weight fluctuated after 8 years and my original wedding ring no longer fit, my husband bought me a new one. Later the same year, he started a new job using machinery and wasn't allowed to wear rings (or watches) - so he had a gold and black wedding band TATTOOED on his ring finger!

And we are still married after 22 years.

Anonymous said...

For those of you who don't like this blog....find something else to read! Deirdre and Alisha are doing their thing! Don't hate because they get paid to say what's on their mind. If I had stayed in the journalism business, I could've done the same, but oh well....

Anonymous said...

My parents have been married going on 33-years now. I don't think I've ever seen my dad without his on, though there might have been the one time when he was getting it worked on now that I think about it. He couldn't slide it off now if he wanted to though. And my mom always has both her diamond and her wedding band on too.

BTW, this isn't the only gig that Alisha and Diedre have at the paper. It's just something interesting they do in addition to their main responsibilities. If you don't like it, STFU since no one is making your hillbilly ass read.