Friday, October 20, 2006

Get this on record: I was wrong

I was wrong. I admit it. I screwed up.

Last week I was working overtime. I e-mailed my husband to ask if he would meet me for dinner. He replied to say he was too busy and he just couldn’t.

I pouted. I wasn’t happy. I didn’t want to eat dinner alone.

As my work day came to a close, I walked out the front door and there was my husband with a huge bouquet of autumn flowers! They were gorgeous, and I just melted. He was playing me the entire time. He wanted to surprise me and boy, did he ever.

So, he drove me to my car, and on the way, I dropped my keys on the floorboard and didn't realize it. We had decided to go to a nice restaurant – 30 minutes away – and I would meet him there. He drove off before I got to my car door. That's when I realized I didn’t have my keys.

I started to run after his car in my two-inch heels, the bouquet in my left hand, my purse and laptop clutched in my right. He must have had Metallica on full blast and the pedal to the metal, because he never saw me in his rear-view mirror.

To make matters worse, we don’t have cell phones. (I know, I know – everyone has a cell phone.) I was so upset. I went back into work, called the restaurant and left my number. He got there, called me back, and I had to give him the bad news.

When he finally got back to me, my frustration had turned into anger. I told him it was all his fault for leaving without checking to make sure I had gotten in the car, and for us not having cell phones, and for world hunger and the war in Iraq! (OK, not the last couple – but you get the point.)

I let my emotions overtake my desire to make the best out of the situation.

He realized I was frustrated and he didn’t say another word. I drove home wanting to put the blame for the night’s failure all on him.

I was wrong, and it took about two hours for me to realize it. Deep down, I didn’t mean to blame him for everything. There comes a time (or many times) when we have to admit we’re human and we overreact – or when we’re just plain wrong.

By the way: I apologized profusely and he now has this blog for proof. We ate together late that night at home, and my flowers are still alive to this day! A happy ending.


Anonymous said...

Good for you for admitting when you are wrong. As for your initial reaction, trust me - you are not alone here. I cannot tell you how many women I've met who go on and on about how "independent" they are and blah, blah, blah. Then when something goes wrong or their life does not quite become the fairy tale they imagined - they find a way to blame a man for not taking care of them. Here's a hint ladies: if you feel the need to constantly tell people that you are independent then you probably aren't. The motto of today's woman is "I want it all, and I want it all at once, and I want it right now, and if I don't get it then it's someone else's fault." It's the spoiled little daddy's girl now has a degree and is in the working world and realizing things were a lot better when everything was given to me - syndrome.

Anonymous said...

Yea: "I dropped my keys," but "It's YOUR fault!"

Men are idiots. Men never do anything right. And even when a man tries to do something nice, it somehow blows up in his face.

There's an incentive to try establishing a relationship with a woman....

Anonymous said...

Men like me have a good quality (in my opinion) that women actually hate. It's this: When I get really mad or upset, I SHUT UP! Pretty much clam up totally. I can actually remember telling my wife, 'Just let me be quiet, you don't want to hear what I would say!' Once I cool down, and can get my thoughts into order, I am ready to talk about it. Many women, though, want to TALK TALK TALK at the point of anger. It's a dangerous moment. I respect your ability to admit what you did is wrong, and I feel bad for your husband. But just for that. I think you sound like a great couple -- you both found a prize!

Anonymous said...

It is important to trust your partner even when they are expressing anger or even moments of silence before discussing an emotionally charged incident. What unfortunately happens I'm afraid all too often is the situation results in irreparable damage to the relationship or at least will require work and cooperation to repair the relationship.

You guys are fortunate to be able to work this out. It's no fun being the one hit with all the blame and losing the relationship as well.

Anonymous said...

alsiha, after reading your blogs, i think you need therapy

Anonymous said...

A "happy ending" for whom? Surely not your husband.

If I was your husband you would've had a frozen dinner alone, on the sofa, which happens to be where you would have slept that night.

Lucky you didn't marry a guy with a spine!