Marriage isn’t easy, but it’s definitely one of the most fulfilling and gratifying things I’ve done so far in my young life. You just can’t beat having your best friend there by your side through thick and thin.
But, there are a few pearls of wisdom I wish I had been privy to before getting hitched. I’m not sure these tidbits of information would have altered any of my actions or decisions, but it is fun to come up with a wish list, right? Hindsight, as they say, is 20-20.
So here’s my list of things I wish I had known before getting married:
· If you have a joint checking account, when your partner buys you a birthday gift, you’re actually buying your own gift. Sometimes it’s easier to cut out the middle man and just go buy what you want.
· Women and men recall the same events differently. “I swear honey, I don’t remember you saying that!”
· Splitting up holidays among family and friends is a chore – one you’re thankful for because you have them in your life, but a chore nonetheless.
· Make sure your home has two bathrooms, one for each of you. It's the smartest move you can make.
· There’s an expectation that you can read the other’s mind.
· Both sets of parents want grandchildren, and they want them now.
· The small things, such as him buying your favorite wine or her mowing the lawn, mean more when you’re married than when you’re just dating.
· You can fall in love all over again, on numerous occasions.
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So here’s my list of things I wish I had known before getting married:
· If you have a joint checking account... your partner buys you a birthday gift, you’re actually buying your own gift.-I disagree, my husband had checks sent to him (from the check for his commissions that are DD ) w/out me catching on. I now have the most beautiful ring, designed by him.
· Women and men recall the same events differently. “I swear honey, I don’t remember you saying that!”-Or "I KNOW I told you!"
· Splitting up holidays among family and friends is a chore – one you’re thankful for because you have them in your life, but a chore nonetheless.-Several years ago my chore was to integrate OUR families (we don't have kids so it was pretty easy), Christmas is at our house with both families. Thanksgiving is either all together or my husband and I away from both. No fuss, no mess (we all live in the Charlotte area)
· There’s an expectation that you can read the other’s mind.-The longer you're together the more you realize your wife REALLY does know what your thinking.
· Both sets of parents want grandchildren, and they want them now.-Do what we did- get tested; find out you can't have children; tell the biggest gossip in your family and you suddenly become the best Aunt and Uncle in the world with out having to say a word.
· The small things, such as him buying your favorite wine or her mowing the lawn, mean more when you’re married than when you’re just dating.-I disagree with this, those were the things that changed this marriage-phobes mind before I even thought of marriage.
· You can fall in love all over again, on numerous occasions.-If you only knew! When my husband grabs my hand as we are riding in the car and brings it up to his lips for a kiss I get the same butterflies I did 10 years ago when he kissed me the first time.
Here's a "post" marriage wish list -
~ A Birthday gift from a "joint" account, any account, is a gift and a sweet loving thing. Enjoy it -
~ When recalling the events, just remember, you had them together thats the best part. Don't sweat the rest.
~ As long as the holidays are spent enjoying "family" - "friends" and each other every day is a precious gift. Just soak it in and enjoy. Life is too short not to.
~ Reading their mind is always convenient, them reading yours and understanding your mind, that is when you know you have come full circle.
~ You have children when you know that both of you are ready to take the responsibility of another human being - TILL YOU DIE - that's called parenting. If you don't want to do that, then don't have them, like anonymous said be the best Aunt and Uncle in the family.
~ Remembering that you like a certain flavor coffee that you don't normally indulge yourself with,he brings it home from that last minute grocery run. Doesn't alter your world, but, it sure makes it feel a little easier to navigate thru. The small stuff, it makes a difference. Married or not.
~ Find a reason every day to fall in love all over again with each other. A touch, a word, a look of understanding. Just do it! That's the part that counts.
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