Friday, October 05, 2007

Are you a 'pet parent'?

The other night I came home late from a long work shift. As I pulled into my driveway I remembered: I was out of cat food and forgot to buy some.

Crap.

Screw it, I thought. I'm not going back out. As usual, my cat Jezebel was right there at the door to greet me and demand her dinner. I weaved and dodged her as I went for the food container and emptied the dregs -- pellets and crumbly fragments -- into her bowl. Jez took a sniff, then looked up, meowing. Clearly, she still expected dinner.

"That's it. That's all you get tonight. Eat up," I announced, then headed upstairs, turning out all the lights. Then I sat in the dark, holding my breath and listening for the crunch of her chowing down. Silence. I risked a peek into the hallway and there she was, walking toward me. Pitiful meows. I went down and tried to talk her into eating. She walked away and plopped down dramatically in the middle of the floor, looking up at me with sad eyes.

Crap.

I trudged upstairs, put my shoes back on and grabbed my wallet. I explained to Jezebel that I would be right back, I was only going to get her some dinner. Then I went to the nearest open gas station and bought her some overpriced tuna.

I recently wrote about relationship trends, and one of them was "pet parents": people who treat their pets as if they were their children. Now, I don't carry Jez around in a purse or dress her up in stupid outfits (have you ever noticed how dogs usually don't seem to care, but cats always have this trapped, "call the SPCA" look in their eyes? It's because cats know stupid outfits are very very WRONG). But I do kiss her and rub my face against her belly while making silly noises, and I talk to her all the time, expecting an answer. I squeal when I see cute toys and buy them for her. When my mother and grandmother call and get the machine, they often coo at Jez, telling her to let "mommy" know they called. And I never make her move, not even when she has stretched her sleeping length across the bed and I'm in some convoluted, cramp-inducing position to accommodate her, or when she's curled up on top of me and I have to go to the bathroom or I'm hungry or the phone is ringing, because she's just so damned cute.

And I go out in the middle of the night to buy tuna fish because she won't eat what she has.

Some of you are nodding in recognition, I just know it. Let's have it, you pet parents (and enablers) out there: what will you do for a furry loved one?

24 comments:

Anonymous said...

Guess what? Pets aren't kids. I get sick of people acting like their pets are equal to children - they aren't. Not even in the same galaxy.

Anonymous said...

I will go out of my way to make sure my pets are healthy and happy. I cook for them while I eat chips. I talk to them nonstop and have to love on them constantly. I dont dress them or carry them around like babies, but they are my babies. The joy they bring me is priceless and I like my pets much more then half the people I meet. I even thank God for my wonderful pets and for allowing me to find them since they were adopted.

Anonymous said...

No, they aren't kids but they are God's creation. "He liveth best who loveth best all things both great and small. For HE who made and loveth us HE made and loveth all", and they are "in the same galaxy".

Anonymous said...

I love my Pug (who happens to be the smartest Pug ever!) and my two beautiful cats, more than I could ever love a child. They are my children. Kids are way overrated in society. Anon 2:33, you're right. Pets aren't kids, thank God! I look forward to seeing my babies at the end of the day. My Pug and my cats won't ever steal money out of my purse, won't ever complain about their curfew, won't make me use my hard-earned money on a college education they won't appreciate, won't ever get arrested, won't scream and misbehave in restaurants, and won't ever cuss me out like your kid probably does with you. I'll take my pet children over a real kid anyday!

Anonymous said...

"I will go out of my way to make sure my pets are healthy and happy. I cook for them while I eat chips. I talk to them nonstop and have to love on them constantly. I dont dress them or carry them around like babies, but they are my babies. The joy they bring me is priceless and I like my pets much more then half the people I meet. I even thank God for my wonderful pets and for allowing me to find them since they were adopted."

I completely agree with this poster. Although, I don't have children yet, and do not yet know what that feels like, I do consider my dog part of my family. He is always happy to see me, never judges me if my hair isn't perfect or my make-up isn't on, and he loves me unconditionally. I just wish there were a few more people in the world just like him.

Anonymous said...

Indeed pets aren't kids. We have 2 dogs and two kids. The dogs are a part of our family just as our girls are. People frustrate me when they take on a pet and then treat it poorly. Pets are part of the family and should be treated that way. Granted we don't sign our dogs names to christmas cards, but they do sleep in our room and are allowed to roam the house freely and share in snacks and naps with us.

Anonymous said...

My cat and dogs are my friends and they were cast off by someone else. I have gone out to get them food at "odd" hours because they depend on me. I can't very well tell them to fend for their selves as I brought them into my home and it means I will care for them.
I'm sorry that anonymous 2:33 has no clue about pets. That person is apparently not in the same galaxy I am in. :(

Anonymous said...

Anon 2:33. Why did you even bother to read the article if you're sick of ppl acting like their pets are kids?

Sounds like someone is cranky and needs to expose themselves to things they hate just to let the pressure off.

I'm more radical than most, but I would take a human life out for one of my dogs. In a heart beat. No questions asked.

And I think *anyone* who abuses an animal, child or an elder needs to be eliminated from this planet. Our gene pool needs some serious cleaning.

We humans take ourselves way too seriously and think much too highly of ourselves.

I don't know any dogs or cats that murder, rape, steal or smoke crack. Do you?

We're not even in the same league as our animal companions. We're an embarrassment compared to them.

Anonymous said...

no, they're not kids. but it's a living thing in your care. that little critter is totally dependent on you for water, food, exercise, shelter, basic medical care. a person who makes sure their pets' needs are being met isn't a crazy "pet parent" person, they're just being a responsible adult.

Anonymous said...

My dog Max is very much a part of our family as any child ever would be, and has been for the last 12 years. She goes everywhere with us, and is truly the light of our lives and has been extremely rewarding to have around. No we don't parade her around in silly outfits, but so what if we did? But we do cook her food for her as it is more healthy than any commercial dog food and take her to the Vet annually and when any other issue comes up. Anyone who has never bonded with an animal in this respect has truly missed out on a very rewarding experience. A dog's love is unconditional. I'm not "acting", I'm being real - Max is my child and receives the same love and attention that a loving mother shows to their child. In my opinion anyone who does not understand this kind of bond is a mean and heartless person. I hope a good dog finds you and warms your heart.

Anonymous said...

I have a dog, and it's up to me if I want to treat her like a child. I couldn't care less what anyone else thinks about it. My little angel is one of the best things that has happened to me. She is an amazing source of joy, and I pity those who don't know the love of an animal. I'm not ready for children yet, but whenever I am, they will grow up with a dog as a family member just like their mother always has. I'll be quite capable of loving my future children AND my fluffy, furry child at the same time. Shocking, I know.

Anonymous said...

I am pregnant with my first child. I have a dog that I love like a child! My child will grow up with a dog as a family member just as I did and learn to love and cherish the bond between humans and animals.

Anonymous said...

It really warms my heart to read there are so many people around who love their pet as much as I do mine. If someone never knows the love a dog can give, they are truly missing out. I can't imagine coming home every afternoon after work and not seeing my precious little dog dancing around my feet because he's so excited I am home. Having had a dog or cat my whole life, I can say with my whole heart that I am a better person for it.

Anonymous said...

"My pug and my cats won't ever steal money out of my purse, won't complain about their curfew...won't ever get arrested..."

No, they won't, but neither will they do errands for you when you get old, take you to the doctor, race home to share their joy about learning something new at school, or grow up to be a contributing member of society. Children are way overrated? I wish some of the posters of comments such as these would consider the fact that had their parents shared those same attitudes, they probably wouldn't be here today.

I absolute adore animals and have always had pets. I couldn't have imagined loving any human more than my dog. Guess what? It IS DIFFERENT. The bond I have with my children is unbreakable, unshakable, almost painful in its intensity. It is my greatest blessing and my biggest trial. Being a good parent calls for SACRIFICE. Children are natural hyprocrite detectors--you have to walk the walk. Don't even attempt to compare the loss of a pet to the loss of a child. Your pets will never grow up to be contributing members of society. Who will come when you need the police or a doctor? No animal is capable of that, and that's OK. The Bible also says something about Man(kind) being created in God's image. I don't think that's applicable to other creatures. Yes, pets are great and wonderful. They will never stoop to the depths of depravity, nor are they able to reach the heights of joy and creativity, the ability to improve the human condition, like HUMANS!

I think people edify their pets this way because they lack the skills or desire to connect with members of their own species in a meaningful way.

Anonymous said...

"I think people edify their pets this way because they lack the skills or desire to connect with members of their own species in a meaningful way."

Wow, that's a pretty darn strong statement. I love my dog like I love all the other special ones in my life (people or otherwise). But I have meaningful relationships with my husband, my parents, the rest of my family, and my friends. To generalize this way and include all people who love their pets very deeply in a category of being unfeeling people towards other human beings is irresponsible, in my opinion. And anyway, wasn't this blog about being a "pet parent" and all the things you would do for them? If you wouldn't call yourself a "pet parent", I don't know why you feel the need to talk down to those of us who do, and tell us we must lack people skills.

Anonymous said...

"I think people edify their pets this way because they lack the skills or desire to connect with members of their own species in a meaningful way."

AMEN!

Anonymous said...

For anyone that can't relate to the wonderful joy a pet can bring to your life is a person I could never relate to. There's nothing in thsi world that I wouldn't do for any of my little furry children. I truly believe that anyone that doesn't like animals doesn't really have a soul, or not the kind of soul I would care to connect with. What an incredible gift that God gave us that you are missing out on...

Anonymous said...

I am a "pet parent" and damn proud of it!
I've done many of the things the author has done for her furry child (except mine is a dog!) I even take him to the dog park for exercise and "play dates" and to doggie day care while I'm at work b/c I can't bare to crate him for 9+ hours/day while I'm away - I don't think it's fair to him.

I have chosen not to have children, not because I didn't want them, but because as a single person, I didn't feel that I had the means to take care of one as I would like to - at least as well as I have been brought up.
In my mind/for me,it is/was a matter of being RESPONSIBLE - both fiscally and morally.
There are many bad "human" parents and I've always felt that one should have a pet before they had "human" children to be sure that they can take care of them properly.

I'm happy with my decision and for me that's all that matters.

Anonymous said...

I get up at 3 in the morning to give the kitties a snack... If they're sick they get food brought to them where ever they are... I had a cat for 18 years and I got up at 4:00 in the morning to let him out, pretty much his whole life.
The first anonymous who is sick of people sounds like someone who shouldn't be allowed to have human children either.

Anonymous said...

I never thought I would even want a pet, but while I was going thru chemo in the hospital, I was introduced to "pet therapy". Dogs and cats visiting patients for times of emotional support that will, hopefully, manafest into physical well being.
Long story short, My cat is extremely loyal and always there to provide support. I dont know if they truly feel love or empathy or if it is what we superinpose on them in our mind. But regardless of which one it is, I dont care. They make me feel good and I'll take it either way. Real or imagined.

Anonymous said...

Well, for those who believe we pet lovers are way too over the top with our affection for our "kids",personally I can't have children and my dog IS my kid. The only one I'll ever be able to have anyway. And I treasure the moment I walk in the door from work and he is so happy and excited to see me and even when I leave home for the smallest amount of time, he acts as though he hasn't seen me for hours. Unconditional love and loyalty.More than what some people with the real kids can claim to have,thank you very much.

Anonymous said...

I've had dogs as pets throughout my life. Nothing compares to the experience of having a child. If anyone thinks that having children and having pets is remotely similar, do us all a favor and don't procreate.

Anonymous said...

The sad thing is that people seem to think you are either a "pet person" or a "kid person". While that may be true, kids may be right for someone while pets may be right for someone else... There's no reason why you should put down either one. I love my pets and don't want to have children and that is my choice. While most of my friends are married and have kids and I love them too. There's nothing wrong with someone showing love for their "family" whether it is pets or children. Having either does not make the other one any less fulfilling for someone else.

Anonymous said...

Wow, so many opinions...some not very nice. I was going to post my thoughts but Anonymous on 10/13 at 7:08 said it perfectly!!!