I want to buy Jenny Sanford a drink. Girlfriend could probably use one about now.
People are slamming on her, saying she's a controlling harpy. So cold, so bossy, so tough. No wonder her man ran into the arms of another woman, they say. If she'd been concentrating on what was going on at home, instead of what was going on at the office, she might not be in this mess.
What a crock.
I think Jenny Sanford is awesome. We've seen a parade of political wives who've stood by their men as they denied or apologized for their sexual indiscretions. Every time there's a chorus of, "why is she putting up with this? How can she stand to be humiliated in such a way? What a fool!" and so on. Then the Sanford crap hits the fan and Miss Jenny is so not like those other wives. She's probably like, "you know what? I've been dealing with this hot mess for five months while this joker tries to figure out what he wants to do. I've already kicked his butt out. The kids will need therapy. And he left Father's Day weekend? No way I'm going down like this!"
So what does she do? When Mark Sanford went missing, she didn't cover for him. She admitted she had no idea where he was, knowing what message that would send. When he held his mea culpa news conference, she and her four boys were nowhere in sight. When reporters asked about her husband's political career, her response was, "his career is not a concern of mine. He'll have to worry about that. I'm going to worry about my family and the character of my children."
Love her.
Jenny Sanford is going through a defining moment in her life, and she has chosen to put herself and her kids first -- not her husband's career. I admire that. She's handling this situation on her terms, which has got to be hard, considering the intense pressure she's under. If she takes her husband back, it won't be for appearance's sake, it'll be because she wants to give their marriage another chance.
Where others see a harpy I see a strong, smart woman who's being straight-up with everyone, especially her husband. Why criticize her for standing up for herself? At least she'll be able to hold her head high after this ... which is more than we can say for Mark Sanford and his Argentinian mistress.
Update: Jenny Sanford offers details about how she found out about the affair here. Man, did her husband dig himself a deep hole!
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29 comments:
Amen!
Great article - I agree!!
Kudos to Jenny. Living it on her terms. If they can salvage the marriage, more power to them.
Gov. Sanford shouldn't have done what he did but I believe some of the blame should be put towards his mistress. You constantly hear woman complaining about their men cheating on them, yet they fail to realize the problem.....women have no respect for each other or relationships. Fix that problem and you may not see this often as we do now. This is coming from a man's point of view.
Uh, no. The marital relationship is between the husband and wife. There is no blame for the mistress. He made a choice. Now he lives with the consequences. It does not matter how the mistress was dressed, how cute she was or how much "sparking" was happening. It was his choice. And I am a married man. Great article ladies.
"...which is more than we can say for Mark Sanford and his Argentinian mistress."
Yeah right! They'll be living it up in Argentina, and Jenny will be schlepping kids around in Columbia South Carolina. Oh boy!
Hopefully Jenny can sit around at the Country Club or her beach house all summer since she does not have to work like the rest of us.
There are many definitions of "love" out there... but I can assure you love IS NOT the rush of hormones and yearning based on sex and a fantasy of what life would be like in an exotic land with a person you mostly know through emails. True love is caring though sickness and health, day by day, through good times and bad. The Gov hasn't a clue. Jenny has done the work here- Best of luck to her and the kids. They deserve better than this immature coward who still is caught up in his fantasy. Let him go. He will see just how miserable life will be one day with the other woman... who will quickly tire of this washed up has been who has no fantasy future.
These love or no love triangle affairs stuff is as old as time..
and the human weaknesses involved or other's finding out that if they are put in the right or wrong place they will be human! Or find out they are human...VERY VERY HUMAN we all are...with our behaviors...emotions..and politics.
Blame him, Blame her, He should, she should...everyone does things at times and either surprises themselves or other's with amazement with how these things happened to them..Live long enough and you know and are no longer surprised by human beings and some of their behaviors at times..
Today there is so much of what years ago wasn't found out and today it is talked about and talked about after being found out..human weaknesses and how we all have them from time to time especially in relationships.
Talking about it or reading about it or hashin the hash..rehashin the rehashin whether
celebrities..politicians...prince or princess, whomever....so BORING and same old same old..
Love is blind or LUST is Blind or finding out if we are put in the right situations we can be very very human and emotions, thoughts and actions we think can be controlled ...become rationalized or out of control..
People either grow closer or further apart from these situations...time will tell on this couple. We all know though, people who have stayed together and other's who have not...the real choices..come afterwards.it seems to me
Jenny Sanford will be needing lots of counseling and a very good lawyer to crawl out from this mess. Smart move not to stand by your Husband!
"Jenny Sanford will be needing lots of counseling and a very good lawyer..."
Nope on the lawyer. She brought the $$$ to the marriage. He brought the ambition.
Amen. I don't understand why our society is so hard on women. We damn them for being wimps if they stand by their man and damn them for being cold if they don't.
She's doing what I'd do in this very public mess -- be there for the kids. They're totally innocent victims of all of this, and I cannot imagine the humiliation they must feel. It's hard enough for a child who endures it without the media glare.
a nice, non biased snapshot into someone's life that you have NO IDEA about.
This is simply someone who has to fill their gossip blog with junk. Charlotte Observer today, US Weekly tomorrow.
You know, as I read this blog today I question and think of all the living arrangements in today's world with so many relationship arrangements; for so many reasons.
I can't begin to name all of them.
But to name a few maybe; people living together and still married yet wanting to not be, yet real estate won't sell and or loss of jobs, benefits, stocks with no money...military people in the wars and those types of arrangements that are sometimes necessary with children and family members. Also same sex choosing to live together, or two people living together rather than marrying. Or some of the senior citzens living in various relationships today with various arrangements that meets both people's needs for financial or health etc.... on and on and I can't begin to judge any of these let alone the one you are talking about in this blog today having to do with a man in POLITICS (again) and those various arrangements as the politicians are living away from family or moving family members; and what they have decided works for them as a couple etc.
Why can't I judge these I ask myself, because I am not walking in their shoes and I don't have a clue what is or has been going on behind closed doors or in the bedroom or what they may have for their particular living arrangement (for whatever the reason may be). Clearly we watch as these various arrangements make the news at times with other's thinking they need to understand and talk of them..then allot of times too one party decides they no longer want the same arrangement anymore....News again is made of these changes as the news draws attention to it all.
So many ways to live together in today's world with so many motives and reasons; and what appears to be the case may not be the case at all as we watch and defend one or the other. I for one do not want to listen to the news about these living arrangements (especially with politicians),and I for sure do not want to make a judgement about another couple's marriage/living arrangement! And what they expect from the other in these private arrangements.
I think of Spencer Tracy and Catherine Hepburn also and smile at their arrangement so many years ago. The list goes on and on..
I know of a marriage relationship that lasted for years..with a mistress or two or how many?..probably I would surely say..a few...
as the wife wanted sex only for having children..this couple had three I believe..
and the good looking husband didn't know this would be the arrangement until after they were married and they had these children..
and sex ended when no more trying for children
...for him..?
What would most guys do in this relationship...leave or stay?
This man and woman had a great relationship because he found other's for what the wife didn't want..what would news do with this arrangement? Of course it was not a man who would be news worthy and nothing was said about this agreed marriage arrangement..with outside activities accepted.
I know of a few other's who have
experienced this sex and control in marriage as well..ummmmmm
What to do???
What a strong woman who knows where her priorities lie! I admire her strength in the public eye while enduring through possibly losing her marriage.
My prayers go out to the Sanford family. Jenny has been eloquent in her responses to the media, her devotion to her children is her priority, and whatever happens to her husband's job is his problem! Finally, a strong Christian woman setting an example by keeping firm to her faith, her ethics, and her priorities.
He is a powerful man, she (Jenny) is old, unattractive woman. You think he is going to be content with that? Your kidding yourself...
To anon at 3:22, you are right her family did and does have $$$. So what. She still needs a good lawyer. When a woman marries a rich man and they divorce (even if it is caused by her cheating) then she gets an attorney to make sure she gets paid on the way out. Well if a man marries a rich woman why shouldn't he do the same thing?
She's not some kind of hero because she is not standing by her man like those other wives of politicians. This is totally different because Sanford is not facing re-election. His term is up as Gov next year, he can't run again, he resigned his post as head of Repub Gov's group, and there's no way he'll be a candidate for 2012 prez now. There's no reason for her to stand there and try to make him look good. He's toast no matter what she does. For a lot of people it is not even about the affair but his being out of touch while Gov and doing it on the taxpayer dime that has ruined him.
I hope Anonymous posted what he did to get a rise out of some of us. CAlling Jenny Sanford old and unattractive, and saying there is no way he (Gov. Sanford) would be satisfied with "that". People don't cheat because of what their spouses do or don't look like. They cheat because they CHEAT. And because their marriage vow does not mean more to them than what they need, personally. Honestly, I don't find Gov. Sanford very attractive himself. He is aging, too: Leathery skin, wrinkles, weak eyes, wimpy physique. My own husband over the years has gained weight and lost a lot of hair, and he snores terribly but he is still the man I married and promised to be faithful to. But I think Anonymous just wanted to spark some arguments - so I will go along with that.
Some like open marriages, some don't. Women support their husbands' careers, or don't, for different reasons.
Oh...please. She wants to "save the marriage". Kick his stupid butt out...no courage whatsoever. Women need a hero!! Where is she?
dont cry for me argentina
Well mr sanford how did she do in bed like a hoit south american woman. Ginny how did you find out? did he start tasting like BANANAS?
why dont GINNY have her move into their mansion so Ginny can film them and then she can cut her up with a SKIL saw .
For a supposedly Georgetown educated and "intelligent" woman with an inheritance to match, everytime Jenny Sanford appears anywhere in the media, she comes across as an uneducated backwoods twit. She makes herself appear just as bad as her husband whenever she opens her mouth! If she had any sense or pride left the next person she would have speaking for her would be a divorce attorney.
I found this blog by trying to find out Mrs. Sanford's age....46? Wow, that surprised me! She looks so much older considering the money she has to keep herself up! Looks aren't everything, granted, but if she really wanted to keep her man from straying she obviously didn't go the extra mile to attempt to keep it from happening. I also don't doubt that she has a few men friends out there that came out of the woodwork to encourage her in filing for divorce so they could get some action (money, not the physical part). I certainly do not condone Mark Sanford's actions and he acted (and continues to act)very sissified and not very heartfelt in his apologies (I think that might be a Southern thing, in men, anyway). I doubt that his Argentinian soul mate will be there to pick up any of his "pieces" but I would bet that many of the women calling him a dog right now (including the authors of this blog) would NOT "kick him out of bed for eating crackers" and would jump at the chance to be in his company if he showed them any interest. He won't be off the market very long, trust me. Especially not in the South.
I just finished reading Jenny's book and I think I have found my soul mate. . . . and I am a woman and not a lesbian. She's my soul mate in that she lived the same life I did, every step of the way. Except my spouse became very successful in business, not politics. We too met when we were young, I had the better job, he was drifting a bit. My family had more to offer than did his. He had a rough childhood, (mother an alcoholic) and he too rose up to lead the family during difficult times. I too, gave up my career, my religion, moved to his hometown and became the cheerleader for HIS life. I thought we were a team and I was being a good member of the team. His success was our success. I too, advised him when he first took over the business after his father died. I too, encouraged him when things were difficult. All this while raising our five sons. The list just goes on and on, the similiarities are eerie. My take away from my divorce after 30 years of marriage (and him looking up an old high school sweetheart who had no problem taking up with a married man with money) was, first, you teach people how to treat you. That means, I allowed certain types of behavior to continue by diminishing my needs over his. And second, I accepted (what I now view as) unacceptable behavior. (I first caught him in an affair with a Latina he had met in Peru). Now, two years after my divorce, I see things more clearly (and others have shared many more things, like other affairs, etc). My family, girlfriends and my faith were there for me in the end. As he became more successful, he believed he was "entitled" to whatever he wanted. He too was restless, irriatable and discontent. I too wanted to slow down, enjoy life, while he continues his frentic pace. Yup, he married her and they now run at that pace together.I am ever so grateful to be apart from him. I am now able to be the person God put me here to be. My life with my sons is so much sweeter. We don't have to talk sports, constantly, when we are together. In the end, I am grateful he moved on because, sadly, I think I would still be stuck in that miserable marriage due to my values and beliefs. And that may have led me to an early grave. So, Jenny, rise up, shine like you are meant to shine and give the world the best you have to offer. We are all ready for it and may Mark (my husband's name was Mark, too) find the peace and happiness he is searching for (in all the wrong places). And thanks for writing my story. Now when anoyone is curious about it, I will just tell them to read your book. It explains everything. Thank you and God Bless.
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