Monday, February 02, 2009

Passing the, um, scream test?

The friend I refer to as Gabrielle, aka "the club kitten," called last night after the Super Bowl to commiserate (we both rooted for the Cardinals) and to share a dating story.

At the all-girl Super Bowl party Gabrielle attended, talk turned to dating during halftime. One of the stories involved a mutual female friend. It seems that when this woman is on a first date, she imagines screaming her date's name during sex. If the name doesn't just flow off the tongue, her interest dims. It's not a deal-breaker, per se, but it doesn't help the date's chances if they have a multisyllabatic moniker.

Gabrielle was floored. She couldn't believe such an assessment was used on a first date. It's rather shallow, no?

Also, "you should see this girl," Gabrielle said. "She is so mousy. To look at her, you wouldn't think she would even scream during sex, and then to imagine her screaming out someone's name?"

The girls at the party saw the look on Gabrielle's face and burst out laughing. Then they started yelling her name in a faux orgasmic frenzy.

The sad/funny/weird thing? After telling me that story, Gabrielle said that she'll probably imagine herself screaming out her next date's name. And now I will, too!

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Slow day in Charlotte I guess. Hey, how about a story on your friend's toe cheese next.

Anonymous said...

My 9 year old daughter does school work on the library computer! I cant believe this is on one of the top stories of Charlotte.com!!
VERY INAPPROPRIATE!!

jpkeever said...

This is the worst section of Charlotte.com that I can ever remember. No wonder no cares or buys the Charlotte Observer any longer. How about spending your time and money on the actual important issues going on today.

Anonymous said...

I guess, instead of actual journalism, they need celebrity gossip and blogs that resemble Hustler magazine stories.

Anonymous said...

Well, Gabrielle doesn't exactly roll off the tongue - - so to speak - - when in the throes of ecstasy.

Anonymous said...

If my name was Robertinaldo, and I was well "endowed", I'm sure she'd manage to scream "Rob", at least.

Anonymous said...

This has got to be the worst input the Observer has ever had. After all the people they have lost to layoffs, this is the best they can offer? You two goofballs need to find another line of work. With all that is going on in the news, this is what the newsroom comes up with?

Anonymous said...

hey, when you get laid off... maybe you can write a blog entitled, "We Can Relate."

Anonymous said...

Congrats you have achieved a new level of shallowness and total absence of ANY class.

Does explain how you got a job at the Observer though..........

Oh, and that screaming you hear will be the sound of the last of the readers fleeing this rag

Anonymous said...

I'm hardly a prude - and as a former employee of the observer, I can only say the fine editors back in my day would never have let this "publish" - please - what makes you think anyone wants to read this?

Ken Thomas said...

It's 2009, and you folks might want to make an effort to catch up. This is not a newspaper article. It's a BLOG that's linked on a newspaper's website. Blogs aren't intended to be hard news. They're observations - some profound, some amusing, some meaningless.

And just for the record? The mousy-looking ones are normally the *real* screamers. Those that are superficially hot are usually too self-consious to let their hair down and really get into it.

Anonymous said...

It may be a blog, and it is 2009, but some editor somewhere decided to link this to the front page of the CharlotteObserver.com website. And that editor, works for the charlotte observer. And the person wrote this blog, works for the newspaper and is paid to write this blog, so guess what, it is published by the newspaper. Finally, it is inappropriate.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if she will also scream when she learns she has a life long STD to live with? Love is temporary but STD's last forever!
That will also be when you change her name to "alley cat" and talk trash about what is sooooooooo cute right now. The path is wide to destruction

Anonymous said...

I am not here to judge anyone..but I must that the comments on this page have more substance that the actual article..


With the current toils we have right now: economy, gas prices,layoffs etc. This is the best they come up with...I think these writers and their editors may want to back to the drawing board.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, ladies (term used loosely). A new low in what passes for journalism.

Anonymous said...

Sorry computer issues
**Edit**



I am not here to judge anyone..but I must say that the comments on this page have more substance that the actual article..

With the current toils we have right now: economy, gas prices,layoffs etc. This is the best they come up with...I think these writers and their editors may want to go back to the drawing board.

In other words...cancel this "filler" blog

Anonymous said...

If you are going to write a blog about sex, at least get better looking women to do it. Or don't post your picture. I hate to sound rude but really, how much sexual experience could thes two have? Oh yea & the Observer is not where I would like to read this type of info.

Anonymous said...

I try not to complain about content because there are many other quality blogs and sites out there that I could go to rather than clicking on this post.

But I can't help it, I am totally dumbfounded that this blog is given a featured spot on charlotte.com. I come to charlotte.com out of habit but I really should delete it from my bookmarks and move on. It is my fault that this type of posting continues to make the main page since I continue to click on the links. Old habits die hard but they do eventually die.

Anonymous said...

What is the point of these BLOGS? You women are like Jr. High School girls slipping notes under desks.....One unhappily married and the other can’t get a Man….